Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1818

Printer-friendly version
The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1818
by Angharad

Copyright © 2012 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
-Dormouse-001.jpg

Once we got the okay from the police, we went and fed the dormice; while in there people from bio-chem arrived to check over the damage caused by the thieves, the police were still in attendance. Once we’d finished with Spike and her pals we went and spoke with the police, who by now had an Inspector present.

We went to my office, which if you recall is near the laboratories and there Danny and I gave statements about what we witnessed, and consequently did.

“Why didn’t you just run off with your son?”

“I didn’t get the chance, they seemed to appear before I could get away, and then I got trapped on the stairs with one of them, and his intentions were anything but friendly.”

“He was the one we found upstairs?”

“No, he was with two of his mates that I trapped on the staircase.”

“Who was the one upstairs, then?”

“He was the one who tried to strangle me,” I pointed to the bruises on my throat.

“Did you have to half kill him?”

“I had to make sure he was of no further threat to me. You saw the size of him.”

“I saw he was quite a big chap, yes.”

“Well I managed to break away from his attempt to kill me, which I think he would have done.”

“So you just broke half the bones in his body defending yourself?”

“Yes, he just didn’t give up until I put him down for keeps. As far as I’m aware, self defence is still legal, or was I supposed to die in order for him not to get too upset?”

“That isn’t what I meant, and you know it.”

“Do I? I protected myself against a larger opponent and tried to save the university from losing thousands of pounds worth of equipment.”

“You seem to have a record of violence, though, don’t you?”

“Do I? I think you’ll find it’s all in self defence.”

“But there appears to be a pattern to it?”

“Yes there is, they attack me and I fight back.”

“You’re not some martial arts expert, are you?”

“Nope, I’ve never done any of them, except a few things my sister in law showed me of kickboxing.”

“Oh like that Yankee film star, Richard wotsisname?”

“Richard Gere, you mean?”

“Officer and a gentleman?”

“I believe so.”

“Must be ’im then. Right, we’ve got your statement and that of your boy, clever young chap–he managed to get away without killing too many of them.”

“Next time I’ll let them get away with half the university, unless of course, they touch my dormice and then I’ll have to kill them all.”

“I hope you’re joking, Lady Cameron, otherwise I’d have to caution you.”

“What for?”

“Threatening behaviour.”

“It wasn’t threat.”

“Sounded like one to me; so what was it then?”

“A prediction.”

“Who are you Nostradamus?”

“No, I have a higher kill rate than he did.”

“You have a very strange sense of humour, Lady Cameron.”

“Inspector Milligan, it could be argued that the most absurd thing here is the law which protects criminals and persecutes victims.”

“So if you’re the victim, how come it’s the other guy who’s in hospital?”

“It’s one of those paradoxes, I showed him the sound of one hand clapping and he fell about laughing so violently he cracked a rib or two and banged his elbow and his knee.”

“Very funny, I don’t think.”

“Yes well you carry on persecuting the innocent, and the villains will love you.”

“I’m just doing my job, ma’am.”

“So am I. I work here remember? Part of that job entails looking after the premises and the equipment.”

He went off and I drove us home. Simon was livid when I told him what happened, while in the other room Danny was elaborating on my tale of derring-do, to the extent that I’d disabled six of them, all armed with sawn-off shotguns.

“They’re talking of prosecuting you?”

“The copper said the guy I took out was claiming I assaulted him.”

“What about the bruises on your neck, get Trish to photograph them.”

“I think I need a doctor to do it, Trish could be accused of doing some Photoshop enhancing.”

“C’mon then, let’s go down the QA.” He insisted and all I wanted to do was eat my dinner and go to bed–I was feeling quite exhausted now–but we went and the doctor on casualty was Ken Nicholls, who happily took some pics and told me he’d write a report for me saying I had a bruised larynx, severe bruising on my throat and possible damage to my trachea.

“I don’t do I?” I asked in astonishment.

“If it stops you getting charged by those idiot plod, I’ll tell ’em you arrested twice while I was assessing you.”

“But that would be wrong.”

“Look, tell Simon to take a walk and I’ll do the kiss of life here and now.”

“Ken, behave yourself–you’re a married man.”

“Damn, you remembered.”

“Yes, now thank you for your support–did the injured one turn up here?”

“I can’t tell you too much about that–breach of patient confidentiality and all that.”

“I don’t suppose the second one came with bruised nadgers, did he?”

“I can’t reveal that, Cathy.”

“So you don’t want me to go and heal them then?”

“If you went through to the ward, you’d frighten the two of them to death.”

I sat and visualised the two men in the ward and sent them healing. “You can discharge them now.”

“What? How come–the one guy was down for surgery tomorrow.”

“He got mysteriously better.”

“But you haven’t touched him?”

“I said it was a mystery, didn’t I?”

“So why bother to half kill him if you were going to sort him out afterwards?”

“I needed the practice.”

“Which, the healing or the physical work out?”

“Perhaps both.”

“Won’t they realise it was you who did it–the healing, I mean?”

“I could always go on the ward and break a few arms and legs for you if you’d like to practice fixing them.”

“No thanks, I’ve got enough to do without fixing up those thugs.”

“Okay, next time I’ll kill ’em for you.”

“How about next time you just run away and let them get on with it?”

“Would you do that if you saw them stealing your equipment?”

“I think I’d have a good look at the size of them before I did anything other than leg it.”

“I didn’t get that chance, they were on me so quickly.”

“I still don’t understand how a mere strip of thing like you hospitalised a mountain of a man like him?”

“Speed, speed and agility; speed, agility and surprise...”

“There isn’t a fanatical devotion to the Pope in there as well, is there?” With that we both fell about laughing.

The phone rang and he took the call, “Sounds like your assailants have mysteriously healed and can go into custody.”

“Must be something in the air here,” I winked and left to find Simon who’d been patiently sat in the waiting room reading a five year old copy of The Field.

05Dolce_Red_l_0.jpg

up
215 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

Comments

Oy...

I like that word. :-)

Cathy seems to enjoy being hard on the Plod... Interesting healing the perps... Wonder how they'll get away with charging her, if they're "cured"...

BTW - while looking for something else, I ran across this bit by Leonard Nimoy.

Annette

The Plod

Sadly, they have to uphold the law which is an ass. In the UK at least, it often seems that the villain has more rights than the victim.

S.

dont the nice folk in the UK

have a vote? let your reps know that laws favoring criminals over their victims need to go... or the representatives will find themselves gone.

Doesnt Help Though !

Yes Woody, we do have a vote. But it doesn't help at all - like yours, our polits only pretend to listen to us just before an election, never after it, and again like yours. we have just two main parties and need a microscope to see any differences between them.

"Put not thy trust in pollyticklers, for thou will be disappointed !"

Briar

Too True.

Briar is just so-oo right. Politicians in Britain are too busy feathering their nests and pandering to Bankers to show any consideration to the electorate.

You should see the house (nay Masion) Tony Blaire has managed to buy after selling himself as some sort of arbitrator to the world. And the idiots believe him. Apparently, he now charges six-figure sums for a single lecture. He was never a socialist, he simply used the Labour party to further his own ends.

As to cheats and thieves well you should see the charge sheet against the 600 and odd members of the British parliament.

It's no wonder the laws are enacted to protect the criminals; most of our MP's are criminals. Britain has too much law and not enough justice.

As to Cathy's being seemingly pilloried by the police, It's hardly the fault of the Police. By and large the police are a reasonably fair and honest bunch but they have to follow laws enacted by the above mentioned criminal members of Parliament. Then those same police officers face the imbicilic behaviour of lawyers and judges in the courts as they try to get the criminals off on the most ridiculous interpretations of the law and the most banal excuses.

Over 300 of our 600 MP's are lawyers and a lawyer is the only person who can get away with ignorance of the law. The only two laws that lawyers can't break are the law of gravity and the law of unintended consequences.

I heartily concur with Cathy's view of the law, we in the LGBT community were for many years abused and even endangered by British law. It's really only the last ten or twenty years the trans-people have been physically protected out on the streets. And that has been brought about not by the law but a change in attitudes by the police. The law has always been there to protect law abiding citizens it just wasn't enforced by the courts.

I love these chapters where Cathy gets embroiled with the police about her right to self protection. The trouble is there are more than two sides to the equations. It's fascinating to see the trans-atlantic perspectives as seen from both sides and compare the reactions.

Keep it up Ang, I love these cameos, so provocative, so much food for thought.

By the way Ang, glad to see that you are prepared to take the occasional break from the writing. Look after yourself love, and don't overdo it.

OXOXOX

Bev.

bev_1.jpg

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1818

OK, Who wants the equipment, and why? And why didn't Spike don her cape and thrash a goon?

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Rulers and masters

Masters like bullies want there victims pacified, trussed up, and helpless like a lamb to the slaughter. As an American Lakota / Blackfeet first people I understand this. And I just refuse to abide it. That is why I love Catherin's way of looking at things. I think like myself she just refused to be domesticated like a cow or sheep. Things never end well for them and being domestic never helped the critter only the master. The plod work for the Masters, like an odd sort of Sheppard who allow the predictor to eat their fill of the herd just to keep the rest of us in line and frightened.

But she realy turned the tables on them by healing them after nearly killing them where is the evidence that she did anything.

With those with open eyes the world reads like a book

celtgirl_0.gif

In attacking Cathy

...the thieves made a Cardinal error...

I have my coat, and the taxi is waiting.

Well thats one way

of getting off an ABH charge i guess , Good for Cathy i say that she could do that , Mind you wouldn't you just give a lot of money to see the faces of the police when they come to inspect the injuries that Cathy was supposed to have inflicted ... Can't help but think though that having seen the standard of some senior officers its about time that the police promoted on talent alone and not because someone knows someone who is a friend of the top brass...

Kirri

Having made all those comments above i feel i must pay my respects to two brave policewomen who were lured to their death by a false emergency call yesterday ... RIP Pc Fiona Bone, 32, and Pc Nicola Hughes, 23, I know that police officers dying in the course of their duties is not unusual in some parts of the world but for us in the UK it is thankfully a relatively rare occurrence .... Long may it stay that way.

Out of site, but not out of mind

The date is Monday, September 24, 2012, and i have just returned from a week with no internet! Well, actually there was internet available, but it was $9 or $10 dollars a day (why do the expensive hotels charge for internet, when the $30 one have free internet? ). The internet in the lobby was free, but it was a business internet, and the network nanny was rather firm about going into some sites (insert VERY ANGRY EMOTICON ). Any way, I am home again after a very enjoyable week at SCC in Atlanta, but I do have some reading to catch up with, so other than kudoes, there may not be many comments.

I missed Bike, and a lot of other BCTS stories while I was gone, and I am glad to see them continue!

Triple ear scritches, scratches and tummy rubbies for Bonzi and Izzy, and if they can handle it, a nice piece of catnip for them.

Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?

Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm

Out of site, but not out of mind

The date is Monday, September 24, 2012, and i have just returned from a week with no internet! Well, actually there was internet available, but it was $9 or $10 dollars a day (why do the expensive hotels charge for internet, when the $30 one have free internet? ). The internet in the lobby was free, but it was a business internet, and the network nanny was rather firm about going into some sites (insert VERY ANGRY EMOTICON ). Any way, I am home again after a very enjoyable week at SCC in Atlanta, but I do have some reading to catch up with, so other than kudoes, there may not be many comments.

I missed Bike, and a lot of other BCTS stories while I was gone, and I am glad to see them continue!

Triple ear scritches, scratches and tummy rubbies for Bonzi and Izzy, and if they can handle it, a nice piece of catnip for them.

Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?

Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm

Out of site, but not out of mind

The date is Monday, September 24, 2012, and i have just returned from a week with no internet! Well, actually there was internet available, but it was $9 or $10 dollars a day (why do the expensive hotels charge for internet, when the $30 one have free internet? ). The internet in the lobby was free, but it was a business internet, and the network nanny was rather firm about going into some sites (insert VERY ANGRY EMOTICON ). Any way, I am home again after a very enjoyable week at SCC in Atlanta, but I do have some reading to catch up with, so other than kudoes, there may not be many comments.

I missed Bike, and a lot of other BCTS stories while I was gone, and I am glad to see them continue!

Triple ear scritches, scratches and tummy rubbies for Bonzi and Izzy, and if they can handle it, a nice piece of catnip for them.

Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?

Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm