Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1072.

Printer-friendly version
The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1072
by Angharad

Copyright © 2010 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
-Dormouse-001.jpg

Whilst we were eating lunch, I glanced at the dates Stella had left for me. Nosey glanced at them too, “What are those, Mummy.”

“What do they look like?”

“Um–dates of the year.” Trish beamed.

“So now you know.” I wasn’t going to talk without being tortured.

“Dates for what, Mummy?”

“Just dates, why do you want to know?”

“ ’Cos I do.”

“Because you’re a nosey-parker, more like.”

“I’m not,” she blushed, “You’re a meanie.”

“I’m not just a meanie, I’m a meanie with secrets.” I smirked and she pouted.

“You are a meanie.”

“And you’re nosey.”

“So? I’m interested.”

“In other people’s business.”

“No, I’m not, you meanie.”

“If this was your business, you’d know what it was all about, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, course I would.”

“Therefore, if you don’t know, it can’t be any of your business, can it?”

“No, I s’pose not,” she huffed away from the table and I smirked again. Julie grabbed her and whispered something in her ear and her face lit up. She walked back to me and said, “If it’s something to do with you, then it will have a knock on effect upon us, so we need to know.”

“If I’m badgered mercilessly, I might tell you, but then, I might change my mind and scrap the whole idea, so you’d be no better off, would you?” I scowled at her.

“So these dates are about something you’re going to do on one of them?” she was walking up and down like Perry Mason before a jury.

“Objection,” I exclaimed.

“Overruled,” said Julie who was pretending to be a judge and she banged the table with her spoon.

“Oh is it now, if you lot aren’t careful I’ll introduce Sharia Law, bundle you up in burkahs and sell you off as child brides.”

“No way, am I wearing a burket, or whatever they call ‘em,” said Danny.

“They’d have a bit of a surprise when they undid the wrapping,” said Julie and they all sniggered.

“Are they like a Barbour, Mummy?” asked Livvie.

“Yeah, they ’ave a ’ood, but they’re not waterproof.” Julie was having some fun with the ignorance of the younger ones.

“Not really, Liv, a Barbour is a waxed cotton jacket, a burkah is an all encompassing cloak thing through which only your eyes can be seen via a slit.”

“Ugh, sounds horrible, Mummy.”

“Lots of women wear them in Arab countries.” I informed them.

“We’s not going to a Awab countwy ah we, Mummy?” Meems decided to increase the confusion.

“That’s what the dates are for, there’s six of them, she gonna sell each one of us off as child brides.” Julie stirred the cauldron and cackled.

“You’re not are you, Mummy?” Trish began to look a little anxious.

“Is that what you think?” I challenged.

“I dunno,” shrugged Trish.

“Do you honestly think that I’ve gone to the bother of adopting you all or trying to, just to sell you off?”

“No, not really, Mummy.” Trish went for reconciliation and part of me wanted to frighten them all–just for a moment–but I remembered it would be me who had to deal with bad dreams and wet beds, so I resisted my horrible urges.

“You might have done,” stirred Julie.

“No she didn’t,” shouted Trish, becoming angry with her elder sibling.

“How do you know? Julie threw back at her.”You don’t know what those dates are for any more than we do.”

“I know Mummy wouldn’t do anything nasty to us.”

“Only because she hasn’t so far.” Julie’s reasoning was superior in its cynicism to Trish’s.

“She loves us, don’t you, Mummy?” Things were getting a bit out of hand and I noticed a few trembling lower lips amongst the younger age group.

“Of course I do.”

“You only have her word for that...” continued Julie, but I was being hugged to death by the others, who felt a need to physically touch me for their comfort and reassurance.

“Oh shut it, Julie,” spat Danny, who was the last to join the group hug.

Once it was over and the kinder reassured, I decided I would spill some of the beans, besides which Stella was parking her car and she’d tell them anyway.

“Okay, these are possible dates for our holiday.”

“Yeh,” squealed Billie, “Where are we going, Mummy?”

“Scotland,” scowled Trish, “to that rotten castle.” She sat with her bad face on and her arms folded.

“The castle–oh wow, can we go, Mummy?” Suddenly Danny was all ears.

“I don’t wanna go,” sulked Trish.

“It’ll be an adventure,” suggested Billie.

“It was an adventure last time. They tried to kill us, didn’t they, Mummy?”

“What the ghosts?” piped Danny, going off on his own fantasy.

“There aren’t any ghosts, the nasty people were Russians, weren’t they, Mummy?”

“They were gangsters, and they won’t trouble us again, Trish.”

“Mummy killed ‘em all,” sang Danny as he danced around in a circle.

“No she didn’t,” protested Trish, “It was the soldiers who got them.”

“They have soldiers at your castle, Mummy, like at the Tower of London and Buckingham Palace.”

“Don’t be silly, they were out in the woods waiting for the Russians.”

“There are woods?” Danny seemed to be excited by all the possible things his fantasy castle could provide.

“Is there a dungeon or dragons, Mummy?” Billie enquired.

“I met no dragons, except a Russian one, and I don’t remember about dungeons–but they could be useful for keeping you lot under control.”

“Did you slay the dragon, Mummy?” asked dancing Danny with great excitement as he re-enacted the slashing and stabbing of something with his imaginary sword.

“No I didn’t, and she went back to Russia.”

“She flew to Russia?” his eyes were as big as saucers, “Did they pick her up on radar?”

Trish rolled her eyes and I nodded to him.

“Did you get any photos, did she breathe flames an’ things?”

“No such thing as dragons,” announced Julie as Stella came through the door with Baby Puddin’, “is there Auntie S?”

“Is there what?” asked a harassed looking Stella–“I’ve been down that clinic for two bloody hours just to get her weighed, I coulda stayed home and done it. Bloody health visitors get on my tits.”

At this all the kids burst out laughing and Stella stood in the middle of the noise looking totally bemused. “What did I say?”

“You said the T word,” I shrugged at her.

“What are the dates for, Auntie Stella?”

“Cathy and Simon’s wedding up in Scotland, why?”

Silence fell amongst the throng.

“Thanks Stella,” I said and wondered how we’d deal with the next group of questions.

05Dolce_Red_l_0.jpg

up
154 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

Comments

Personalities

What wonderful images captured - Trish attempting to interrogate Cathy, Julie playing Devil's Advocate, Danny acting out medieval "knight in shining armour" fantasies, Billie excited by the prospect of adventure but not feeling the need to act them out, and Mima either silently observing or elsewhere. Then Stella marching in with all the tact of our glorious (*COUGH*) leader on a foreign excursion.

 


EAFOAB Episode Summaries

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't...

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

Six of one

Or half a dozen of the other.

It always seems to add up to the same thing for Cathy, trouble.
Just wait until the arguments start over the theme for the bride's maid's dresses, not to mention a new shade of Cameron tartan to mix'n match.
Those dungeons might actually come in handy!
Good luck Cathy, - you're gonna' need it!
Weddings cause more family rows than wills cos you cant row with the deceased.

I'm looking forward to the wedding arrangements.

Still lovin' it.

OXOXOX

Bev.

bev_1.jpg

Thanks Stella for doing what I expectd

besides which Stella was parking her car and she’d tell them anyway. Like clockwork.

2 out of 5 boxes of tissue and 5 gold starsDesHS.jpg

Goddess Bless you

Love Desiree

Goddess Bless you

Love Desiree

Careful Cathy!

Given the unfortunate backgrounds of Cathy's children, there's a very fine line she's walking between teasing them and reassuring them.

It just shows that at their ages, trust is a very fragile thing.

Thanks A+B for yet another fascinating glimpse of life in the Cameron family.

Personal Support

Bike Archive Bike Map

Bike pt 1072.

I can just see Simon and Henry laughing when they hear what happened. AS for Monica, she's a wild card that'll have fun creating merry havoc for the children.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

I found the group hug

Scene very touching as Cathy remembered that kids are very literal and you can only tease them so far before they get upset. Surprised that Julie didn't join in.

Stella

Just been thinking that Stella needs to learn two new words .... Secrecey and Diplomacy

Loving your work please keep it going

Debra

Poor Stella

caught unawares , I hope Cathy hasn't told her anything really important, Because if a group of nosey kids can find out what they wanted too know that easily, You would really have to think twice before telling her any real secrets...

Kirri

Well,

At least Trish is now on board. She was the hard case. Of course, I expect Cathy knew this was going to be the case.

Cathy still hasn't said what a Velodrome is.

Cathy knew Stella would tell, so she derived as much perverse pleasure as possible.
Julie is quite the trouble maker, but Trish can hold her own.

Cefin