Age Dysphoria

The Many Faces of Harry Potter 33

“The Many Faces of Har—er, Adira Potter: Chapter 33”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Thirty-three: The Second Task

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for the bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. But some canon scenes are just too good to change much.

Five for Fifty

“No matter what happens … no matter whether or not you grant my wish … I just want to say how much I appreciate your friendship. You’ve been kind and patient and compassionate, helpful and honest and … most of all … been there when I’ve needed you. Thank you.”

Five for Fifty

by Maggie the Kitten

Designer Children Chapter 30

Ashley/Madison's ward is revealed. Meanwhile, Christmas comes to Twin Falls and with it, the entire Patterson/Feinstein family, including Emma and Sophia. With the combination of the shiny plastic that Christmas morning will bring and the constant desire to untether her imagination with her cousins, surrender to the serum may be inevitable.

Yet Another Day as an Outcast

Life sucks when you're a rager, especially when you're a rager on a training team called Outcast Corner at Whateley Academy. Between bullies, idiots and Gunnery Sergeant Oscar Bardue, Jack Carlyle, formerly Erin has to put up with Grunts, Goobers and putting up with one of the "Pretties" that Jericho seems to insist he and Diamondback need to meet.

All In A Day's Work

All In A Day’s Work

By Joannebarbarella


This is a tribute to someone who did not even know she was a heroine (and probably still doesn’t). She’s a member of our sorority here at BC. I have not sought her permission to publish this piece as it can be construed as fiction, and probably much of it is, but I hope she likes it. I think she may recognize herself.

This might also qualify for Dorothy’s Challenge

*********************

Signed, Sealed and Delivered An Edited Re-post Part 1

Signed, Sealed, and Delivered

By Cathy_t_

This was my very first attempt at writing anything for others to read. The idea for the story is mine but the inspiration for doing it at all comes from two wonderful angels I met on the net one dark night in my life. They stopped me from doing something very stupid that night and I would like to dedicate this story to them. To Prue and Neri. Without their help and encouragement this story would not exist. Nor would I.

PART 1
*****************

Sometimes, A Wish Can Come True

The man, who appeared to be about 55 years of age with silver coloured mid-shoulder length hair, wearing a medium brown lightweight woollen suit with vest and a hideous bright orange tie that made it look like he was about to burst into flame, sat in his usual chair in front of the roaring fire at the back of the small but cozy bar in the Midwest college town that he had been frequenting for almost six years now.

Designer Children Chapter 29

The search for the mysterious girl on the playground continues. Could it be Ashley, or the figment of an imagination desperate for some modicum of hope? Meanwhile, Ryan’s eyes open to a new reality, one where the serum hasn’t simply regressed his adult mind and stripped away his masculinity.

Designer Children Chapter 28

Chapter 28

The night, once a time where Ryan Sullivan plied his silver tongue on vulnerable sorority girls in dim keg parties and bars, now has a new meaning. Fear. Monsters both real and imagined live within its confines terrifying the burgeoning little girl within. Who can banish that fear? Mommy and Daddy. Despite this clear defeat, Ryan/Kaylee continues to try and assert himself.

Excerpt:

Gradually, the banishment of the dark and the hand stopped my incessant, uncontrollable sniveling. Through it all, I shook and mewled words that mostly didn’t exist. I turned to face the two voices in my room. A smiling, yet worried Kathryn, hair mussed, clad in a silk nightgown, looked down at me. Within her look and her touch, there was love. It was palpable. Thomas stood next to her at my bedside. He was the one who plugged in the Frozen-themed night light.

Designer Children Chapter 27

From what happened in the studio, it is clear that acting like a child causes further regression. While Ryan cannot avoid being treated as a six-year old girl, he attempts to curb the more destructive childish behaviour, but this means playing along with his developing role in the Patterson household. While this might be easy in a controlled environment, the first day of school looms and with it, the greatest and most important battle against the serum.

Excerpt:
Like a dog, I immediately perked up at the words ‘good girl’. Deep down inside, beneath the layers of what remained of my fractured masculinity, something stirred. A great lumbering beast, with twin pigtails and a bouncy, happy smile, heard those words and devoured them, but it was a morsel, and the beast wanted a never-ending feast. It was too late by the time I realized the happy smile was plastered on my face.

I was being attacked on all sides- the desire for praise and to receive that praise by helping, circumventing my usual defences. Greg and Eve never really praised me for anything. I mean they wouldn’t have thanked me for something completely mundane or said I was a good girl, not if they wanted to continue breathing normally. Mrs. Feinstein wasn’t one to heap praise either, but when she did, I reacted similarly. It was obvious, however, that since I arrived in Twin Falls, and I was really being treated like a child, I was regressing. The same thing had happened in the studio even before Ashley’s memory wipe

Designer Children Chapter 26

Ryan continues to be at odds with his new parents, especially regarding his language, which continues to impact his screen time, the allotment needed in order to check and send e-mails to Eve and Greg. The illusion of choice presented frustrates Ryan, who quickly realizes that an option is not acceptable unless vetted by ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’.

Excerpt:
Kathryn looked momentarily defeated, and then she pulled out her credit card, grabbed me by the wrist while saying, “Ring me through please, Alexis. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Moments later, I was being dragged through the parking lot.

The car door swung open and Kathryn put me in the backseat. She slid into the driver’s seat, while the child locks on either side of me clicked shut. Like a snake, Kathryn’s head slithered into my view, the rest of her body either attached to some terrible monster or simply hidden by her seat.

Designer Children Chapter 25

Kaylee’s adoptive parents are revealed, and the slow and final dismantling of Ryan Sullivan begins. Trapped with those who treat him exactly as he looks, Ryan is desperate to maintain his adult and male self, but is he too far gone? Still, his new parents offer a new beginning, an opportunity to right the wrongs of his previous life, but most importantly, a chance to be loved unconditionally.

Excerpt: Ms. McDavid said, “Oh I’m sure she’ll adjust fine, Kathryn. Just keep in mind what I told you too, Kaylee’s probably picked up some bad habits working in Hollywood. It’s a different lifestyle, so expect some strange behaviour. That’s why it’s important to make sure she has as normal a childhood as possible.”

The man, whose name I recalled was Thomas, said, “What do you mean, Ms. McDavid?”

Ms. McDavid smiled, “Don’t be in a hurry to let her grow up too fast. Kids her age want a lot of independence, but you can’t forget how old she is. She’ll need your help to guide her. She’s also got a very active little imagination. Try and encourage her to use it as much as possible. But most of all, just let her be a kid!”

Designer Children Chapter 24

With the decision regarding the adoption looming, Eve and Ryan grow closer- the former enemies now connecting on a deeper level- beyond even friends. With this closeness, however, comes jealousy from an unlikely source. As this occurs, Ryan’s adoptive parents are revealed.

Excerpt: I was groggy, but I understood the instructions. The memory of the betrayal still cut deeply, and the wound was corrupted, oozing blackened blood. Mrs. Feinstein, the only person who didn’t lie to me, go behind my back in this life, had acted as a reference for someone other than Greg and Eve.

Apparently, our friendship meant more to me than I initially believed because my heart ached, while my head buzzed with a million reasons for her disloyalty. Did she distrust Greg and Eve, question their parenting, have money at stake in it, simply hate me and want to hurt me? At least the whole thing with Sophia at the park was an accident caused by the overzealousness of a child, but here- there was no excusing her behaviour.

Designer Children Chapter 23

Is withholding the truth the same as an outright lie? What was done to protect Ryan’s vulnerable mind has driven the equivalent of a railroad spike into the fledging relationship between the two former enemies. Yet, the public adoption draws near and all must remain idyllic in the household, even with the betrayal.
Excerpt:

I wanted to run away. It is what I always did. Jessica continued to speak, but I didn’t hear anything. The barking dogs, the sweet incessant nattering of Jessica, her voice akin to taking a bite of candy and finding a railroad spike inside- all of it disappeared the instant I slipped out of Jessica’s grip and ran.

I ran as fast as I could, each section of chain link fence passing in a flash. Seconds later, I felt a firm hand dig into my shoulder, stopping my momentum dead.

Jessica said softly, “I don’t know if it’s the serum doing this to you, or if a part of you actually wants it, but if you don’t want me to say anything to Eve I won’t. You need to know though that there’s probably going to be a point of no return. And it’s going to be soon.”

Designer Children Chapter 22

With the arrival of Jessica’s niece, Ryan is in grave danger. Telling Jessica the truth could save him from the mousy little girl, but it is no easy task. Ryan’s attempt to grasp at his fleeting masculinity and his genuine feelings for the woman could ultimately doom him, leaving a mirror image of the demure Brianna.

Excerpt:

My heart fluttered, allowing the fog to once again cloud my mind. Jessica gave the case another shake, dislodging a Barbie who had been stubbornly hanging from the lip of the container. It fell within an inch of my hand. I looked down and saw beautiful golden tresses mixed with purple and pink and a slender body wearing a pretty light blue bathing suit. Despite the fog, the doll’s ever smiling face sent a shiver of fear up my spine. I knew that taking the plastic toy into my hands would place my mind in a child-like state, one where imagination was boundless. Memories of the toilet paper roll Olaf watching Elsa skate gracefully across the bathroom floor flooded in, causing my hand to recoil from the doll. I couldn’t help but feel like an addict, the uneasy hand reaching toward the pill, the pipe, the needle- knowing that one hit would bring clouded bliss, but like the drug, it would erase my identity, everything I was, until only a smiling little girl remained. Perhaps one at docile and timid as Brianna. Her perfect twin.

Designer Children Chapter 21

While Jessica has saved Ryan from the day camp, she has her own ideas about how six-year old girls should be treated and what media they should be exposed to. In the meantime, Ryan struggles with fact that Jessica’s body, perfection encased in yoga pants, represents something else entirely for him now.

Excerpt:
The yoga pants clung to her like a second skin. Her muscular ass, perfectly firm yet enticingly round, sat high, teasing as it thrust forward and backward, practically begging for a pair of hands to gently squeeze it. Her long blonde hair unbound dipped gracefully over one shoulder. She grasped her left foot, slowly bringing it back, until it was parallel with her head. For anyone else, the pose and fitness wear would have revealed a litany of flaws, a drooping ass, and low-hanging belly combined with love handles, mottled thighs, but with her, it only screamed her perfection.

I watched, or rather stared, at Jessica as she went through a series of yoga stretches. Before my change, it would have been enough to have me practically begging her for sex. It wasn’t something that I did- ever, but for her I would have made an exception. She turned onto her side and lifted herself into a side plank. As she did this, she was forced to flex her ass, which caused her yoga pants to go from gym appropriate to indecent in seconds. The pants were virtually non-existent near her ass, looking like they were, instead, masterful tattoos.

Designer Children Chapter 20

Ryan’s foolish and childish behaviour causes Eve to take a firmer stance with him. Meanwhile, despite his earlier bravado, Ryan learns just how deeply the serum runs. While he struggles with this, a simple knock on the door of the apartment changes everything.

Excerpt: I nodded, “No more closed door bullshit?”

Eve said, “None. We can talk about the adoption too. You’ve got a choice in this, Ryan. If you don’t want us to adopt you, we can look at other options. The best thing for you now though is to try to maintain control. Fight your impulses. You might find that when you start putting your thoughts down that you can better understand yourself and what you are going through.”

I had expected a completely different conversation, one that involved a lot of screaming and threats. If anything, I was impressed with Eve’s calm demeanour. That feeling of warmth was still there, but now that I understood what Eve was trying to do, it felt different. Maybe she was really just trying to help?

Designer Children Chapter 19

The world now knows of Kaylee’s existence. As talk of adoption heats up, Ryan’s mind, twisted by the serum begins to play tricks on him. Meanwhile, Ryan struggles with trying to reassert his identity through something other than the formerly tantalizing opposite sex.

Excerpt: But this was nothing like the sudden warmth I felt when the little girl hugged her mother. The warmth was not heat, unlike a blanket covering a shivering form, it elicited a response from my heart. I knew heartache, at least as long it took for me to find another girl, and another, to fill the void left by Hannah, but this was something else entirely.

My heart, my chest, my brain- everything was filled to bursting with an overwhelming sense of love- to give and receive it in an immeasurable fashion. The only thing similar to it was the intense, incredible high I got from sex, but it wasn’t lust, the hard wrenching of parts, stares and longing, until the moment of climax, and then nothing- no, it was something real. Lasting.

And that’s why it scared the fuck out of me. Because it didn’t exist. To me it had to be the serum, and I was staring at my future if I embraced this world.

Designer Children Chapter 18

A woman’s body- an object of sexual desire, meant to titillate, to spur the fantasies of males young and old alike, yet for Ryan Sullivan, now simply flesh and bones. This realization, which has shaken his masculinity to its core has left him vulnerable to the whims of a somewhat bossy little girl. For the former alpha male, with this seemingly critical piece gone, what else is there left? Why continue the fight?

Excerpt: A tingle of pleasure ran up my spine followed by a contented sigh. I knew that the girl wasn’t my real mother, and that she was probably only eight years old, but she made me feel like I was a little boy again. A memory flashed- my mom lifting me out of the bath, and then rubbing me dry before wrapping me in a towel. I slipped into a cozy bed, wearing my favourite Batman PJs, the ones with the tear in the left armpit. It was a time when that hated target, the person I eventually wouldn’t respect, wouldn’t listen to, when she was mommy. It was a perfect, pure memory, and the further I descended into its warm embrace, the more my life- the one where I struggled to survive, where I wore pain and betrayal and loss like tattoos, angry lines and spiteful colours striking a pattern of cynicism, distrust and excess- the more that life faded away.

Gone as if it had never existed.

I never wanted this moment to end.

Designer Children Chapter 17

Finally understanding that he cannot wage the war against the serum alone, Ryan accepts Greg and Eve’s help. After the close call with the doll, Greg’s suggests a trip to the beach to wake up the old Ryan Sullivan. Ryan readily accepts, but the trip will hardly be a simple day at the beach. While there will be a multitude of flesh to attract a red-blooded male, there also exists many attractions to awaken the little girl within.

Excerpt: The door closed and the footsteps rapidly retreated. I was left holding a plastic doll, and while my humiliation in Greg’s presence was staggering to both my male ego and my adult self, I couldn’t help but want to continue playing. It was like some drug filling my mind and body with such a real sense of happiness that it was easy to ignore the fact that such actions were eating away at Ryan Sullivan. The toys, the sense of adventure, the world of imagination that Hermie spoke of were the vultures circling over the soon-to-be corpse.

But it was rainbows, cotton candy, pretty dresses, and a life where finding someone to play with would be my greatest worry. I knew that children worried about more important stuff. Some of them even faced crippling anxiety. A friend of mine, the same one with all the incredible video games, was a wreck every time his dad went on a tour of duty. I knew better, but the drug swimming in my system was smiles and sunshine.

I desperately needed help.

Designer Children Chapter 16

Ryan faces the consequences for mouthing off to Mrs. Feinstein in a way that puts his acting skills to the ultimate test. Meanwhile, the continued vulnerability displayed by Ryan brings out Eve’s softer side, and while it brings the two closer together, the closeness raises concerns, especially with regard to Eve’s strange behaviour.

Excerpt:
I felt my mouth droop into a frown, my emotions fluctuating wildly, like a roller coaster suddenly thrown into reverse. I looked up and Eve’s features had softened. Her caramel skin was radiant, her eyes welcoming, and her mouth formed a gentle smile. Her expression screamed, “Tell me what’s wrong, baby girl, and I’ll make it better.”

I pulled away from her, stomping my feet in the shiny black shoes that Eve was making me wear. I hated the little straps that went across my stockinged feet. I had worn a similar outfit in the studio with the same dress. I cursed myself for bringing the dresses and shoes from the studio, but I didn’t have any other outfits outside of the sparkly blue butterfly shirt and jeans. Still, it meant that I could avoid a shopping trip with Eve, which would undoubtedly have crushed my male ego even further.

Designer Children Chapter 15

After the visit to the studio, with his frustration mounting, Ryan retreats to one of his old vices. While the obsession with video games had seemingly doomed Mark and Devon, a greater danger looms just outside his window.

Excerpt:

A skipping rope slapped gently against the asphalt, each jump and each giggle caused candy-coated claws to dig into my mind, the claws digging deeper and deeper as my desire to join the girls grew.

“Wow! You did three skips that time! I wanna be good like that!”

I looked out the window and saw a skipping rope tied to a telephone pole. Two girls, one of them Kaylee’s age and one Ashley’s, were taking turns holding the rope. Each time they failed to jump the rope, they switched places. The whiney, nattering voice of the younger girl should have been a massive turnoff, like a beautiful girl with a mannish voice, but instead, it planted a powerful need, an alien yearning to reach out to these girls- to play with them, but it also caused a resurgence of doubt.

“Would they even want to play with me?”

Designer Children Chapter 14

While there is safety within the walls of the apartment, away from the prying eyes of the outside world, Ryan continues to struggle with who he is becoming, as the serum persists in eroding his masculine and adult identity. Meanwhile, Eve, who seems to have warmed to Ryan, attempts to get him to open up concerning what happened in the studio. Finally, even tucked away safe within the walls, Ryan cannot be saved from himself, and a brief exchange threatens that very safety.

Excerpt: I narrowed my eyes, while feeling my lower lip gently lower into a pout, “Do you really think I’m that weak? And Elsa and Anna were apart for ten years, living in the same castle. We could have done the same thing in the apartment.”

A look of shock crossed Eve’s features, her eyebrows shooting upward, and her mouth momentarily agape. She composed herself, and the softness, which had become commonplace, returned. It was a look I had seen rarely in the woman before my change, but the doe-like tenderness and warmth in her eyes, and even the way she held her mouth, in a slight and comforting smile- it made me want to spill my guts to her- to tell her everything.

The Many Faces of Harry Potter 20

“The Many Faces of Har—er, Adira Potter: Chapter 20”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Twenty: The Strange Prophecy

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for the bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. It's been frustrating me, too, but some things are just too perfect already to change. Which, fair warning, includes most of the conversation Fudge, Hagrid, Flitwick, and McGonagall have in The Three Broomsticks.

Hannah is.. safe [2.17]

ourIceMain.jpg If you can't restrain yourself, then restrain yourself.. that makes grammatical sense I guess?

Events unfold including but not limited to:
John being the sensitive one
(well.. as much as he can be at least)
And Hannah works through breakfast.


The Many Faces of Harry Potter 19

“The Many Faces of Har—er, Adira Potter: Chapter 19”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Nineteen: Home

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for any bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. It's been frustrating me, too, but some things are just too perfect already to change.

Hannah is.. grounded [2.13]

ourIceMain.jpg Some people are good at breaking down the walls you put up around yourself.
Some of them take that phrase a bit too literally..

Events unfold including but not limited to:
John mocking Hannah's choice of reading material
(Even though he owns half of them himself, the hypocrite.)
And Hannah rebels!


The Many Faces of Harry Potter 18

“The Many Faces of Harry Potter: Chapter 18”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Eighteen: Pardons, Patronuses, and Coming Out

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for any bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. It's been frustrating me, too, but some things are just too perfect already to change.

Hannah is.. good at fixing things at least [2.7]

ourIceMain.jpg It's usually hard to pick up the pieces, we tend to think that some things would take a miracle to be repaired.

Events unfold including but not limited to:
A purring Betty
(an amazing thing considering her age)
And Hannah gets to enjoy venting, in more ways then one.


The Many Faces of Harry Potter 17

“The Many Faces of Harry Potter: Chapter 17”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Seventeen: The Broom, the Secret, and the Traitor

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for any bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. It's been frustrating me, too, but some things are just too perfect already to change.

The Many Faces of Harry Potter 16

“The Many Faces of Harry Potter: Chapter 16”
By = Fayanora

Chapter Sixteen: Freedom

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for the bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. It's been frustrating me, too, but some things are just too perfect already to change. Which, fair warning, includes most of the conversation Fudge, Hagrid, Flitwick, and McGonagall have in The Three Broomsticks.

Her Fondest Wish 1

Ariana has two wishes. First, because she was born assigned the wrong gender, her fondest wish is that she could be a fully functioning woman with a vagina and uterus. Secondly, she wants to be a little girl because her first childhood sucked, and because her fondest kink is to be "molested" by a loving adult. In this story, she meets someone who makes both her wishes come true.

“Her Fondest Wish”
By = Sure As Elle

“All strapped in and comfortable, my dear?”

I nodded. “I’m ready, Javier.”

The Many Faces of Harry Potter 11

“The Many Faces of Harry Potter: Chapter 11”

By = Fayanora

 

Chapter Eleven: Return of the Return of the Heir

 

Note 1: Text in 'Italics and British quotes' is Parseltongue.

 

Note 2: Once more, I apologize for the bits and pieces of canon dialogue/narration here and there. A bit more of it here than normal; one scene, I couldn't really improve upon or change.

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