Petey's Lament - A Musical in One Act!

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Petey's Lament

A Musical in One Act

by Andrea Lena DiMaggio
 



Ginnie:
Sure I want you to stay over, but Daddy is crazy. If he finds you?

Petey:
Relax, you said he's not coming home until 10!

[clunk of car door closing]

Ginnie:
Shit...He's home...the game musta been rained out...Quick, put this on!

Petey:
Whathefuck, Ginnie! This is a nightgown!

Ginnie:
Sure...I'll just say you're one of my girlfriends!

Petey:
Yeah...but what do I do about....?
(points to groin)

Ginnie:
Here...I saw this on Maury....I think it's called a giraffe...you pull it down...thru there.

Petey:
Owww!

Ginnie:
Stop fussing...he's comin' up the stairs!

[Petey steps into the middle of Ginnie's Bedroom, the lights dim and a spotlight hits the mark where he stands....Cue music....]

Petey:
Here I stand thing in hand
wond'rin what the fuck
it stands right out, what's that about?
Guess I gotta push and tuck...uck...uck!

Once again I'm feelin' pain
much to my dismay
I can see her stare at me
And I hear her say...ay...ay!

Ginnie:
Hey you've got to hide your thing away
Hey you've got to hide your thing away

Petey:
Wond'rin how I fix it now
she's payin' more attention
it's gettin' big despite this rig....
I'm filled with apprehe...ehhn...shun!

Petey:
OOpsies she says to me

Ginnie:
Your willie still is showin'
it's too late to masturbate

Both:
and it seems to still be grow...ohhh....in

Petey:
Hey come help me hide my thing away
Hey come help me hide my thing away

Ginnie:
Pull this thing down and through, pull it down and through
If Daddy finds out that you're a boy, he'll kill both me...eeee...aaaand.....yoooooooooo!

Ginnie:
Oh...Hi, Daddy.

Dad:
Hi, Kitten. Who's your friend?

Ginnie:
This is Pete...Petra...Petra....Johnson.


Curtain

Based on You've Got to Hide Your Love Away
words and music by Lennon and McCartney
Performed by
rockstar122083
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WARzNGDkslM

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Comments

Hide it ?

ALISON

I've been trying to hide it for years but it just won't go away.Maybe if I get a 'giraffe'.Might help!!

ALISON

Hi Gram...

Or maybe an anaconda???!!! OMG!!!

Your Lil' Irish Brat

I want to know will there be

I want to know will there be another verse? Now I'm thinking "Second verse, same as the first". (Flashback to Hermans Hermits Henry The Eighth).

reminds me of an old commercial

for Mentos. I always thought it was a good beginning for a transgender story....

DogSig.png

Petey's Lament - A Musical in One Act!

Very cute. Reminds me of quite a few stories here.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Interesting you chose that piece...

We always hear stories of the story behind the music, right? I seem to recall that it was John Lennon himself, in some taped interview, who admitted that he wrote "You Got To Hide Your Love Away" as a tribute to their manager, Brian Epstein and his partner.

PB

Hiding sucks...

Andrea Lena's picture

...and I'm tired. Either way, thank you for the information. This song was like my anthem when I was in bed and sick for two months when I was thirteen. The melody was especially appealing, but I only realized recently how important the lyrics were. Thanks!


Dio vi benedica tutti
Con grande amore e di affetto
Andrea Lena

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

Good one, it is.

Good one, it is.